The Third Epistle of Elder Hobbs

Happy Wednesday dear readers! I'm trying a new strategy with this email. I will transcribe the day's events as they occur, and format things on a day by day basis. However as I have written I've found that this format is simply too effective! Reading this email will be a significant undertaking, yet I do not feel I should shorten it. But I remembered that I've been titling these as epistles, so I felt it would be both useful and funny if I broke this email up into chapters and verses.The next epistle will likely be significantly shorter. And probably a lot more optimistic since I'll be in the field!Please grant me feedback about how you feel about this format, as I only have a phone I haven't the slightest idea of how the formatting looks on a desktop. If you just want a summary, skip to chapter 8.

Mission Photos: https://photos.app.goo.gl/ffTdfUoqUfe9ysnD8

Mission Art & Sketchbook: https://photos.app.goo.gl/gd9QLB9Et3ck3no49

Chapter 1: Wednesday - P day, Temple trip, vegemite and paupers.

1 And it came to pass that it was preparation day. We skipped breakfast today to make it to the temple.

2 I purchased another new Peruvian tie from the MTC store. A few days prior I also got myself a short sleeved shirt as it grows quite warm in the afternoons.

3 We went to the temple today (unlike last week where my companion and I weren't able to find the bus until long after it had departed) and did the endowment. It is lovely but terribly long.

4 Afterwards my district took some photos and hermana Jensen somewhat photo bombed one of my selfies. (Though it made for a better photo)

5 After the temple visit I partook of the most bland cheeseburger I've tasted in all my life (and 4 onion rings, with a glass of root beer), before returning to the dorms.

6 Once we returned, I called with some family and worked on my laundry. As well as drafting some responses to emails.

7 Yesterday the apostle Neil L Anderson visited, and he had a lovely devotional for us.

8 There are a few things that stuck out to me, some good and one bad, I shall list the good first.

9 Here are some things he said:

10 "you [missionaries] are an extension of the first presidency and the twelve"

11 it was a lovely reminder of the importance of us to the church. And thus it was good.

12 "Nothing speaks so clearly of Christ and His atonement save it be the Book of Mormon"

13 I'm spending two years trying to get people to love the Book of Mormon; reminders of how awesome it is are very useful. And thus it was good.

14 "As you desire it, the power of God shall rest upon us and grow within us."

15 "Not one of us can do everything, but together we can do so much."

16 Just a great reminder of the power of the community we've got here, and why helping it grow is so vital. And thus it was good.

17 Now for the bad.

18 In elder Anderson's talk he mentioned how we will often have much better circumstances than those we are teaching;

19 And that we mustn't give them any kind of monetary aid (for the gospel is far more valuable than any riches.)

20 This isn't necessarily bad, and it's more than reasonable for it to be said (for we are teaching the gospel and not doing charity work out here).

21 However it does bring up an issue often levied against folks preaching religion that's been commented on quite a bit.

22 On a completely unrelated note here's some lyrics to a song as I can remember it, written by Joseph Hillstrom over a century ago:

The preacher and the slave

By Joe Hill

To the tune of: the sweet by and by

1 Long haired preachers come out every night,

Try to tell you what's wrong and what's right,

But when asked about something to eat,

They will answer with voices to sweet:

Chorus:

You will eat, by and by,

In that glorious land in the sky,

Work and pray, Live on hay,

You'll get pie in the sky when you die

2 And the starvation army they play,

And they sing and they clap and they pray,

Till they get all your coin on the drum,

Then they tell you when you're on the bum:

3 Holy rollers and junkers come out,

And they sing and they clap and they shout,

Give your money to Jesus, they say,

And you'll eat on that glorious day!

End of song

23 I gotta admit though, if I were some impoverished person born to poor circumstances,

24 and if a couple of American teenagers came and told me Jesus was the solution, rather than issuing any kind of aid:

25 I'd probably pick a fight with them.

26 But despite my thinking, the poorest of society are generally those who are most willing to listen to the gospel, follow its teachings, and live in Christ's example.

27 Karl Marx once said religion was the painkiller of the people, and I testify that this is true.

28 Christ wants us to have joy and he is willing to ease our pains and lighten our burdens in all occasions.

29 For dinner I had 4 salteens, a chicken noodle soup, and a bowl of cookie dough ice-cream.

30 Language class was generally normal, though near the end we all became hysterical and burst into laughter at the slightest instance of comedy.

31 I think I've mentioned this in a previous email, but I can't be bothered to check.

32 My district is like extremely close, the sisters have referred to us as the familia. (Don't get jealous, rest of my family)

33 I feel like elders Troncoso, Rasumussen, and Miner are truly my brothers.

35 I feel as though sisters Tanner, Jensen, and Knudsen are truly my sisters:

36 (Though I've never had sisters so this is more of a theory based on substantial evidence than true knowledge).

37 Elder Troncoso mentioned that a lot of districts tear each other apart as one goes through the MTC;

38 Meanwhile our district just gets closer. Honestly I might've called it quits if not for them.

39 In other news: Supposedly Troncoso got someone to try some vegemite on the bus to the temple today

40 so that's fun.

Chapter Two

Thursday and Friday:

Illness, the story of the foolish missionary, and gifts from family

1 To start the day my companion had some pretty crummy leg cramps.

2 Then we got some breakfast, where I had some scrambled eggs, a hashbrown and a boiled sausage.

3 I slathered the whole thing in barbecue sauce and drank it with a sprite (for they were out of barq's)

4 My companion and I both wore some peruvian hand-woven ties we got from the mtc yesterday.

5 Then we had another 3 hour spanish class.

6 For lunch I had a loaded potato soup. And I think it's entirely certain that I've come down with something.

7 I believe it's known as the missionary cold, however I think proselytizer's plague sounds much cooler.

8 The plague is utterly beating me up; after lunch we went to the MTC store and got some cold medicine.

9 After this we went to the dorm to rest, and I read my Book of Mormon mostly.

10 Then we went to language study.

11 Hermano Roosa was in a meeting so we got to do it outside wherein elder Troncoso helped many more partake of vegemite.

12 For dinner I had more soup.

13 Sometime in the day I think Elder Miner and I consecrated some oil for blessings. I don't remember what day I did this.

14 I kinda suck at saying cool things with the loose rubric for the prayers, I gotta trust in the spirit some more.

15 Then it was friday.

16 I woke up feeling better, taking cold medicine works pretty great at beating sickness.

17 I had a soda and half a pancake without syrup for breakfast.

18 Our first teacher of the day was sick so we had a sub.

19 Then for lunch I had a bowl of chili and I got an email that I got some packages.

20 Then we went to the mailroom and I got my two packages.

21 Inside my parents had sent me art supplies in one, and candy in the other; it was much appreciated.

22 Then I spent the afternoon practicing with my new watercolors and memorizing the first vision in Spanish, and I finally have it down.

23 Then we met the hermanas for language study. I finished memorizing the first vision (mostly), and got some help from hermana Knudsen for learning watercolor (results in sketchbook photo album).

24 Then we had a 3 hour spanish class with a sub.

25 And it came to pass during elder's branch prayer that president Rosen scared us straight with a spooky story. A story about needing to stay with our companions.

26 Herein I shall relate it to the best of my ability as I remember it was shared.

27 I (president Roden) was a young man not much older than the rest of you. I was in the mission office doing paperwork for the mission president, when one unusual day the mission president stormed in.

28 His face was red, we all were in fear for he normally was a man of great compassion.

29 He stormed past me and immediately got on the phone.

30 He began to yell on the phone, his voice was loud and full of wrath. I cannot remember what was said, but I do remember one yelled phrase:

31 "WHERE WERE YOU ELDER?!"

32 I didn't quite get all the story so I had to ask Elder Troncoso what the story was about. From Elder Troncoso's understanding:

33 A missionary was soon about to return home, and his companion was having a hard time adjusting to missionary life.

34 And he was likely going to be having an even tougher time once the missionary would return home (as new companions can be a great gamble).

35 The missionary had stepped out for just a short moment, he had assumed his companion would be entirely fine on his own for a moment.

36 Supposedly, his companion had, in the short moment alone, taken his own life.

37 President Roden finished his story with a lot of warnings and invitations:

38 We must stick by our companions

39 We mustn't allow any disobedience or concerns to go unreported.

40 When a missionary frequently disobeys missionary standards, his companion is at least partially to blame

41 He also reaffirmed a previous message that we shouldn't be offering blessings to ease sickness or blessings of comfort.

42 We can only give blessings to people who specifically request them.

43 Though, later I also learned that a lot of the sisters are being told to avoid asking for blessings unless absolutely necessary

44 so that's a bit interesting. It raised a few questions.

45 What's this dang Melchizedek priesthood for if we're being repeatedly disincentivized from using it?

46 Isn't the point of priesthood to help others via the power of God?

47 I suppose I'll get plenty of opportunities to bless folks during the mission, but it'd be nice to get a bit of practice in so I don't give the lamest blessing ever.

Chapter 3

Saturday:

Musical debate, Jesus and the young rich ruler, and illness.

1 Woke up feeling fine but with a messed up voice:

2 My higher singing registers sounded sickly while my bass sounded more resonant. Probably mucus.

3 Then I had some french toast sticks for breakfast.

4 Our morning class went fine and we sang hymn 1203.

5 Hermana knudsen and I shortly argued whether "greensleeves" or "what child is this" was older, and thankfully the copyright info under the hymn gave us some clarity.

6 Then I practiced with watercolors a bit more to try using multiple colors rather than one.

7 Then I ate potato soup for lunch.

8 After lunch it came to pass that after some study with the sisters, we spent most of the afternoon watching a black widow kill a grasshopper.

9 The spider was quite interesting, it acted swiftly with little hesitation. It was a bloodthirsty beast.

10 Then I had tomato soup for dinner. I was also reading a bit of the gospels and I figure I'd share a neat story I liked.

11 The portion I will be referencing is found in Luke chapter 18 in the New Testament.

12 Unlike most missionaries quoting scriptures, I will entirely retell the story (as I've read in many a conference talk).

13 Naturally some things are quite a bit different as I've modified the story based on my interpretation of it.

14 So don't go quoting this like scripture, for that kinda thing you'd better go to the source.

15 (Though I understand it may be tempting with the verses and chapters added to this epistle)

16 When Jesus was out teaching, a man of riches came and asked "Oh, Great preacher, what must I do to obtain eternal life?"

17 Jesus then said to the man, "Why do you call me Great? None are Great except for God."

18 Then Jesus asked the man "Do you know of the commandments, Don't commit adultery, Don't kill, etc..."

19 The man said to Jesus, "Yes I know of these and I have kept them since the days of my youth"

20 Then Jesus looked to the great rainment of the man, and said "Yet there is one great thing you lack".

21 The man looked around bewildered and asked, "What is it that I lack?"

22 Jesus then spoke "Sell all of your luxuries, properties, and riches."

23 Jesus continued "Take those riches and distribute them among the poor, among those who have worked your lands, among the infirm and desperate, among paupers and beggars too."

24 "Then you shall have treasure in heaven, and then you shall truly follow me." Jesus concluded.

25 The man looked to Jesus in tears, for he knew the words of Jesus were true, but he knew he could not obey;

26 His heart had long been beguiled by Satan. (As Satan has long used worldly rewards, truth twisted into falsity, tricks, and devils to control the hearts of mankind since the age of Adam & Eve.)

27 And when Jesus saw that he was sorrowful, he loudly proclaimed "How impossible it is for those who have riches to enter the kingdom of God! It is easier for a camel to pass through the eye of a needle, and easier for a fish to write an epistle, than it is for a rich man to pass into the kingdom of the father."

28 They asked Jesus, "who then can be saved?"

29 Jesus took a moment before responding, "Only a man who has dedicated himself entirely to God, with a broken heart and a contrite spirit, one who does not worship wealth or body or mind."

30 "For through man, one shall find only death; but through God, one shall find salvation, joy, and eternal life."

31 And the people verily were overjoyed by the message of Jesus.

32 Then in the evening we had a long and boring class.

33 The sisters had to leave early, for both hermana Knudsen and Tanner have caught the prosyletizer's plague.

Chapter 4:

Sunday morning:

Church and the story of the missionary among violence

1 Woke up still with a terrible sore throat. I can't sing tenor, only bass broken up by coughs.

2 I either speak deep with a slightly gravelly voice, or I speak high and sound perpetually sad.

3 Though I can't manage much more than a sentence before my voice gives out.

4 Then I ate a breakfast of cheese-its and soda, much better than the cereal provided.

5 I would've had a hot pocket but the vending machine was out. After gargling some soda my voice improved somewhat; now I can manage the perpetually sad sick voice without collapsing into a fit of coughing.

6 Then we did some phone checks, and Elder DL (Rasmussen) attended a meeting with his companion.

7 Elder Miner and I went to explore our building when I ran into an old friend of mine, Elder Ethan Bell

8 Then I attended Sacrament meeting, struggled to sing a bit, and worked on adding some stuff to this email to make it less boring.

9 Then during Elder's quorum we talked about trials and the power of God. During this, Brother Smith shared his story, which I will paraphrase below:

10 Brother Smith was in Nicaragua in the 1970's.

11 At the time, the mission president was in Honduras and was late to respond to the unfolding events in the region.

12 At the time the people (being communists) were overthrowing their dictator (Samoza?) in a bloody civil war.

13 Throughout the capital city machine gun fire, tanks, and bombs could be heard as the nationalist forces battled against the people.

14 Brother Smith and his companion were in a neighborhood on the outskirts of this city.

15 They didn't know of any active fighting in their direct vicinity, but the sounds of war could distantly be heard.

16 Smith and his companion were on their way to an appointment when the companion stopped them amid a busy intersection wherein the people were joyfully residing as children played in their yards.

17 Smith, being the younger missionary, trusted his companion's judgement and they made to turn around.

18 Just as they turned for home, a feeling of dread washed over both. They could not return home.

19 Being unable to return home or visit the appointment, they made for a nearby member's home.

20 As they began teaching in this member's home, they heard the dreadful sound of tanks and armored vehicles.

21 They quickly made their way to the bedroom, barricaded the door with a mattress, and dove to the ground.

22 As soon as they had done this, the sounds of screams and machine gun fire resounded across the neighborhood.

23 Several bullets even bit into their mattress barricade.

24 Smith, his companion, and the member huddled to the ground all throughout the afternoon, evening, night, and into the next morning until eventually a silence had resounded for a half hour.

25 All the while, Brother Smith had been praying dissent to the Father:

26 "As soon as I'm out of here, I'm going home. I came here to preach the gospel, not go to the middle of a war."

27 And other such thoughts.

28 [Brother Smith began to cry as he told the next part of the story.]

29 Smith and his companion, realizing the coast was clear (for the nationalists had departed), made a quick escape towards their apartment.

30 Eventually, they reached the intersection from earlier.

31 Brother Smith looked around him, everyone whom he had saw earlier: men, women, and children:

32 now lied upon the ground dead.

33 How wicked was the world!

34 Truly Satan had meant it when he said he would reign with blood and terror.

35 These people must be saved. Brother Smith had a renewed sense of purpose.

36 Anyways that was that story.

36 After Elder's quorum I ate a lunch of soup and a root beer float, then the elders in my district embarked upon the silk road.

37 I did not follow in their stead for my ties were all gifts (and verily for that reason they are all quite dear to me).

38 I fixed my bed, then we went to the Sunday afternoon devotional.

39 The devotional contained a great deal of spiritual messages:

40 Revelation involves both the mind and the heart.

41 If we prayerfully study the scriptures and follow the Lord's commandments; Then we can recieve revelation - especially as a missionary.

42 According to Hermana Tanner, Hermana Jensen has an aura of light-green.

43 Hermana Knudsen did not attend the post-afternoon devotional review, for her illness was too great.

44 And it came to pass that we had a study session and a later discussion.

45 And it became well apparent to me that this chapter was becoming far too long, and rather than make an abridgement of the record, I shall split Sunday in two.

Chapter 5

Sunday Afternoon

Discussions, revelations, and invitations

1 And it came to pass that after an hour of personal study of the holy scriptures, we had a discussion about our learnings with Brother Smith

2 (This brother Smith was the very same whom had delivered his testimony and story during elder's quorum earlier in the day.)

3 And the messages of this discussion were long and detailed.

3 Thus I cannot hope to detail them in their entirety.

4 However I have abridged and paraphrased the next messages in a manner fitting for cohesion.

5 Loving our brothers and sisters is the first and easiest task; helping them along is the difficult part.

6 Because of the faith of the brother of Jared, he was permitted to see beyond mortal means to see eternity.

7 Though the record was sealed for the words are not yet ready to us.

8 Talking to a lot of different faiths, most agree we are saved by grace; but we need works to boot!

9 It is simple, because it is merely following Christ and what he commanded of us. God doesn't just want us to believe in Him, He wants us to BE with Him.

10 Enduring to the end isn't just about waiting it out, it's about a continual cycle of growth and rebirth. It's a spiral staircase, not a circle.

11 As we keep learning line upon line, we just keep growing, there is no end.

12 Our life's purpose can grow from terrifying to exciting through God's plan.

13 There is more to this world than worldly experiences, pleasures, and riches.

14 By serving God's children our own identity will be revealed. Now, on to the stripling warriors:

15 What faith does it take to honor your oath to pacifism when people are coming for your family?

16 The Stripling warriors found great strength because of the faith of their mothers.

17 Mothers can literally strengthen armies!

18 Now as I finish writing these things we arrive at dinner. Wherein I ate a pasta.

19 And it came to pass that Elder Troncoso spoke a long and great speech, though its contents are so great that I cannot hope to enscribe it -

20 And I know this, for the Spirit has revealed it unto me in my prayer when I asked.

21 And it came to pass many spiritual things were said at the devotional in the evening

22 so many things were said, that I entirely forgot to transcribe them.

23 and thus the day concluded.

Chapter 6

Monday

1 Again I have awoken with a cursed voice. I cannot sing or talk for extended periods. Perhaps I am cursed!

2 Elder Troncoso has been chosen for a trip to temple square today. Therefore we dropped him off with his group, and then Elder Miner, Elder Rasmussen, and I formed a temporary trio.

3 And class was terribly boring without elder Troncoso. Though I am getting the hang of spanish a bit more.

4 Then it was lunch, and I had a strange sandwich of unusual construction and material. The bread tasted vaguely of bagel, the meat was tender and tasteless yet white, and it was coated in nacho cheese sauce.

5 The food here is strange

6 and then came the afternoon study. I began to sew a tie with some socks I found. (I could not wear them as socks for they were not black).

7 My companions were deeply in tune with personal study, Elder Rasmussen watched a Joseph Smith movie found in the gospel library app.

8 Then we went to language study. It was quite uneventful without the loud Hermana Jensen or Elder Troncoso. (And it should be known that Hermana Jensen was speaking with the Spanish consulate).

9 Then I ate Texas chili for dinner, and it was good.

10 After dinner we returned to our dorm. Seeing that my voice had made no process of recovery (as I could not even sing called to serve without sounding poor), I decided to resort to an unusual means.

11 I received a blessing for the sick from Elder Rasmussen and Elder Miner. I felt the Spirit in the words of Elder Miner, and I hope I shall be soon to recover.

12 Then came evening language class, Troncoso returned to join us then. We also took a short field trip to the creamery express where I got a 9 oz bag of puppy chow (or muddy buddies if you are a corporate shill).

13 During language class, many of the elders were extremely exhausted for whatever reason; thankfully I was spared of this weariness.

Chapter 7

Tuesday

1 I awoke today with a voice much improved. I could sing low with zero issue, and I could sing some high parts with only a few instances of sick voice.

2 And I can reach most notes without my voice failing me (sustaining such notes is not possible yet) and singing beyond my normal range is still entirely impossible.

3 My lack of knowledge of musical terminology is really biting me here as I can't really comment upon my own singing ability without greately misusing terms.

4 But I can say that the blessing I received yesterday has certainly helped. I hereby testify and stand witness to the power of God and His priesthood.

5 Then I had a disk of sausage for breakfast.

6 I've got to say I've really improved at whistling on the mission. Being unable to sing for the better part of a week has made me use my whistle a heck of a lot more. I'm really quite the fancy whistler nowadays.

7 I can even sustain notes on the inhale, which lets me whistle without needing to stop for breath. I also heard some verbrado in a whistle I heard in the halls of the dorms, so I've been trying to emulate that as well.

8 My watercoloring has also improved significantly. I went from being unable to watercolor at all, to being better with watercolors than my colored pencils; all in the course of a week.

9 The Lord has a t-shirt cannon full of talents that he keeps firing at me.

10 Then another language class occurred.

11 Eventually came dinner of pizza.

12 The day was dull.

13 It has become well apparent to me that this epistle is incredibly dull to read and it was difficult to write. I think it unlikely that I shall ever write an email in this manner again.

Chapter 8

Invitations and reflections

1 I write this final message to summarize this epistle and to offer my final thoughts and invitations unto the readers.

2 Every week at the MTC my conditions have worsened and worsened. This may be the worst place I've ever been in my life.

3 Simultaneously I find more and more joy in the experience. I love my companion and I love my district. I feel closer to the Savior now than I ever have before.

4 I have found a greater joy and determination simply through serving the Lord, and I'm not even in the field yet!

5 If any of you lack a testimony or a knowledge of the gospel, I encourage you to pray earnestly with humility and an earnest desire to truly know, and it shall be granted unto you.

6 The Savior atoned for all of our sins; He knows us each personally. Do not be afraid to come unto Him, for His hand is already outstretched unto you. You have not strayed beyond His hand; the path is always within reach.

7 I say these things in the name of Jesus Christ, Amen.

End of the Epistle.